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We go back into ourselves
The encasing breaks down-it shatters, it sheds, it dissolves
We reverse into our future
swallowed by the illuminated gravity of singularity
Our path is dissolved
And we are home

 

 

Source

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My breath, just as the sun is the life of the Earth, is the life of my body and the gift of my spirit.  As I inhale, I am filled with all that precede me.  As I exhale, I give to all of those that will succeed me.  There is no shortage of breath as long as the hand of the giver is still wide open.  With this I must know that in any moment the hand can be withdrawn and allow my body to fall limp and breathless.  Read More

I Am Freedom!

i-am-freedom

 

I am powerful

I am beauty

I am brilliance

I am enough

Through the grace of the divine can I refine and attune to her pure nature

Refine my integrity, deepen my humility

So that I may use of myself to show others the way to their power, beauty and brilliance

And help them walk the pathway of liberation

And liberate myself

Into the boundless reigns of freedom!

Great Pretender

Yep, that’s the game that I played, and for a very long time

I pretended I was happy when I wasn’t

I wanted to hide in the secret abode in the darkest part of my shadow

I used to play make believe with myself that I thought life was worth something

Then the shadow encompassed everything

Its own aura was too visible to fool me, the one that was pretending that is

I put on three costumes a day

One for work, one for the slow passing of the daylight hours, and one for my nighttime unconscious sleep

My mind told me what I wanted, so I went along acting as though it was the best thing for my soul

I pretended my mind and I were friends

But really it was an act of bowing down just as an obedient slave does to his abusive master

You see, I am in a game, a twisted game where I tried to hide from myself

Only I became miserable while playing and fell asleep

Jokes on me, I forgot I was playing

What’s the hardest part of this game?

Believing I had stopped pretending

“It’s all gonna be okay” I say

“I’m never gonna do this, and for sure I’m never gonna do that” I say

“No! Shame on you for feeling that way” it says

All the while an uncontrolled fire is raging inside screaming “Stop it! Release me!”

My stories, many stories keep me pretending

One day, I tell myself, the stories will end

The act will be over and the costumes will lay to rot

But when…

Today. Today is the day

I slowly remember I walk in a dream and wake up to the stories, the many stories

They crumble to dust and blow away

Shut down the lights

The pretender has left the stage

An Evening with My Flute

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I sat in the park directly in front of the sun under a canopy on a picnic table.  The sun was full, large, and approaching orange at the horizon of my view-point. There were cars driving to and from on the streets below, kids playing soccer on the grass, teens playing basketball on the courts, and patrons walking their dogs.  It felt like the noisy busy energy one would expect being in the midst of all the surrounding activity. I pick up the Native American flute and put it to my mouth. Right before I blow my first note I look out and take a deep breath.  I play.  From low to high, high to low, I play the notes.  I played what my fingered wanted.  I listened to the sounds coming out of my flute; simultaneously I can hear the space around me.  The activity in the park was still happening, but it became silent.  I continued to play and I got a vision from what I was feeling.  The vibrations my flute penetrated the space around me puncturing holes on the space fabric.  Hearing the sounds around me was like hearing the world through a transparent shield.  Though somehow they were clear and crisp.  The chirping of the birds, the dancing whistles of the leaves on the trees, it was moving in stillness.

I played more music, spontaneously letting my fingers use more variety.  I looked down, and upon my right leg was a fly.  Initially I blew on it so it would fly away.  It did not fly away.  So, I moved my leg slightly to help it move along.  Still it did not budge.  I shrugged by shoulders in acceptance and continued to play.  With part of my attention still on the fly I began to wonder what it was doing.  It rubbed its legs together and fluttered its wings, but it did not move from that spot.  Now, being really interested in this fly, I put my face very close to it.  I looked and it then blew on it to see what it was going to do.  Still it did not move.  At this point I assumed it wanted to hear more flute music, so I continued to play.  Not too soon later it flew off to some other adventure.

The sun fell lower in the sky and grew a darker illuminating everything with a tint of sunkiss orange.  It drew my attention.  It was in my line of sight sitting in the middle two of four palm trees that were parallel to each other with gaps in-between.  While sitting just below the leaves of the tree, the moving wind moved the tops of the trees from left to right, back and forth, giving the sun a hypnotizing pulsating effect.  It was penetrating my attention and warming my skin its blanket of rays.  It felt like kindness and love; it was gentle and soothing.  Its blanket spread out into the stillness of the entire park- still, quiet, warm, and comforting.

I continued to play again letting my fingers do as they will and a profound glimpse of a moment from the book Siddhartha appears to me.  In that less that a split second I could see it was that moment when Siddhartha sat on the river in a boat with his friend Vasudeva and listened to the river.  He heard many voices at the same time overlapping each other until they all become the one single sound of Om.  That was the moment when Siddhartha realized everything and everybody is All One, all one consciousness, and he reached his ultimate attainment.  That section of the book which would have taken me more than minutes to read flashed before me in an instant.  But I had gone into a moment that was beyond the story as if slightly experiencing the story for myself.

I eventually became so calm and relaxed on the inside and outside that I ceased playing the flute.  The sun was sending its greetings as it was setting for the day.  I absorbed myself in the sun’s aura and warmth as it was making its final descent.  I bowed to it in gratitude and reverence; after all, it had listened to my music.  I say good-night and leave the person that initially came into the park- a different person left the park.

They Say Everything

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Wall to Wall.”

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One wall, two wall, three wall, four
Oh the things they could tell you once you step beyond my door
Frogs, and bears, and tigers, and feathers
Swans with swords, and it only gets better
There are many things of color with phrases upon them
It speaks so simply but you must listen beyond them

Each piece on my walls from its whole are the parts
To see each one by one is to learn the way of my heart
Sometimes Id like to think I chose them, but they chose me
How they came into my life was all meant to be

One wall, two wall, three wall, four
They can speak the journeys of my life when you come through my door
Once in a night, they have told me of my ancient pasts
And of my wrongs, of my goods, and lord, of my bads.
They can tell you of my journeys of the dimensions we’ve been together
On my walls hang my friends that help me to remember

One trip around the walls is all you need to know
That love lives here and it what I use to grow.

Labels and Categories

http://10cities10years.com/2015/01/08/why-do-we-seek-labels/

This link above caught my eye very quickly, as a couple of days ago in my communications class I gave a short presentation called  How Others See Me and How I want to be Seen. You see, most of us identify with labels because we choose to, or because they are given to use by no choice of our own. We are very quick to say we are not something, yet are equally as quick to try to fit into something. And that’s just it. We have to feel we belong to something; it is our nature to want to belong to a community. We have gotten it a little out of sorts though and think we need to the labels to tell others and ourselves who we are when really they are not who we are at all.

In my presentation, I had two different collages. One was a representation of the labels, which I called characters, that have been associated with me by others and myself, and the other collage was a representation of how I would like others to see me.

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To reiterate my presentation, the first collage was an explanation of the characters that were associated with me. The second collage has a white person in the middle with a rainbow body around it. The middle is the blank canvas. The faces are just characters that I play at the moment I am wearing them. I can take them off at anytime because I can be anything at anytime. Just as a little girl can change the cloths and wigs of a doll, just as an actor/actress changes costumes with the change of character or scene, it is too so that I change characters and can remove them.

It is societal and family conditioning that we grow up with. But remember folks, no matter what you do, say, think, or how you feel in any moment, its something that you wear for the time being. You can take it off and put on something else, or you can be a blank canvas like the person standing in the middle of its different faces.  Have fun dressing up!